Together for two years. I was married, and he was married too. Both adults, 40 and 50. We fell in love. After five months, we left our spouses.
However, while I left my husband—despite our warm working relationship—my lover left his wife and two children (aged 16 and 18) for an apartment one floor below his old home! They had grown up in the same building. So, they "broke up" but still live in the same building.
He refuses to even consider inviting me over. When I visited a couple of times, it was a scene: his daughter got upset, his son cried, and his ex-wife went hysterical. A complete circus. I accepted that it’s a complicated situation, and I can’t go there.
We mostly live at my place or go on weekend getaways almost every week. But about a month ago, I lost my apartment keys. The spare key was with my mom, who was away. I was essentially homeless.
Sure, I could have found a hotel or stayed with friends, but I thought this situation was a real problem, not just a whim. Under these circumstances, my partner could have let me stay the night at his place! He could have escorted me to his apartment, found the words to explain to his kids and ex-wife, or figured out some solution.
But he flat-out refused. “No, you can’t come here, and this will never happen, no matter the circumstances!” I asked, “So even if I literally have nowhere to stay and I’m on the street? Should I go to the train station???” He replied, “Yes. Even in that case. If you want, I’ll go to the train station with you, or we can book a hotel room—I’ll come and stay with you there. I’m willing to walk around the city with you all night. But you can’t come to my home.”
This situation shocked me. I really want opinions on this. I’d appreciate a variety of perspectives (just be kind, I haven’t done anything bad to you, right?).
