Revealed: The Secret Mindset Behind High-Achieving Kids
Jennifer Breheny Wallace dives into the intricacies of what really fuels long-term success in children. After six years of researching high-achieving kids, she’s uncovered a compelling truth about how a simple mindset shift can make all the difference.
The Hidden Driver of Achievement
Wallace’s research, featured in her book “Never Enough,” with a Baylor University collaboration, revealed that many young achievers operate under the heavy weight of conditional regard — the notion that love and acceptance are tied to performance. Such a belief can lead to burnout, a fragile self-worth, and vulnerability to setbacks.
The Mattering Mindset: A Game-Changer
What differentiates the healthy high achievers? It’s the assurance that their value is inherent and untied to outcomes. When kids realize their worth remains constant, they can boldly face challenges and learn from their mistakes.
1. Know Your Child Inside and Out
Understand their strengths and passions. Celebrate their uniqueness and let them know you see and value them for who they are — this recognition is empowering.
2. Value Beyond Performance
When challenges arise, like failing a test or not making a team, remind your child that their worth is immutable. Teach them through vivid examples, like the undiminishing value of a $20 bill, despite its state.
3. Foster an Environment of Curiosity
Rather than reacting with anger to setbacks, adopt a curious stance. Understand the root of struggles — be it a learning difference or social issues — to help them navigate these hurdles.
4. Highlight Their Impact
Celebrate the moments where they make a positive contribution, like comforting a friend or coming up with innovative ideas. Show them their value is found in their influence on others.
5. Show Affection Freely
Embrace the joy of parenting beyond academic success. Let your face light up when you see them, indicating that their worth isn’t tied to their achievements.
As the new school year begins, Wallace advises parents to prioritize nurturing a mindset in their children that emphasizes inherent value over external achievements. This is the real fuel for lifelong success.
As stated in CNBC, Jennifer Breheny Wallace’s insights offer a fresh perspective on fostering truly thriving young individuals, grounded in the undeniable value every child holds.
For more insights and parenting strategies, consider reading Wallace’s work and other expert advice to cultivate an environment of unconditional love and support for your child.
